Why is Happiness So Elusive?

Everyone of us is searching for true happiness. But seldom do we really find it except at some brief moments which often normally slip away too quickly and escape our grasp, leaving us with just a lingering memory to reminisce about. And it's not a coincidence that the more you tighten your grip around it, the more it will try to elude you.

Most of the time we are just left with nothing but regret and resentment due to a past that went awry and makes our "HERE" and "NOW" seemingly unbearable. Or a sheer hope pinned on some future event that we wish to happen, and makes us want to skip or abandon the present moment and fast forward our lives. Or worst is a feeling of fear and dread of the unknown in what is yet to come, which plagues us and thus prevents us to be truly happy NOW. An unknown that may or may not even happen. But we seldom are aware of the present moment and at peace with the NOW, which is the only thing about time that is real.

But why is true and lasting happiness so elusive? And what is the secret to experiencing it for more than fleeting moments?

Being a huge fan of Echart Tolle, I would like to share his 10 powerful insights. Mr. Tolle is the New York Time’s bestselling author of The Power of Now and A New Earth-Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose. And now comes his newest book, Oneness with All Life.

These are the Ten Ways to A Happier YOU by Echart Tolle:

1. Don't seek happiness. If you seek it, you won't find it, because seeking is the antithesis of happiness. Happiness is ever elusive, but freedom from unhappiness is attainable now, by facing what is rather than making up stories about it.
2. The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral, which always is as it is. There is the situation or the fact, and here are my thoughts about it. Instead of making up stories, stay with the facts. For example, "I am ruined" is a story. It limits you and prevents you from taking effective action. "I have 50 cents left in my bank account" is a fact. Facing facts is always empowering.
3. See if you can catch the voice in your head, perhaps in the very moment it complains about something, and recognize it for what it is: the voice of the ego, no more than a thought. Whenever you notice that voice, you will also realize that you are not the voice, but the one who is aware of it. In fact, you are the awareness that is aware of the voice. In the background, there is the awareness. In the foreground, there is the voice, the thinker. In this way you are becoming free of the ego, free of the unobserved mind.
4. Wherever you look, there is plenty of circumstantial evidence for the reality of time—a rotting apple, your face in the bathroom mirror compared with your face in a photo taken 30 years ago—yet you never find any direct evidence, you never experience time itself. You only ever experience the present moment.
5. Why do anxiety, stress, or negativity arise? Because you turned away from the present moment. And why did you do that? You thought something else was more important. One small error, one misperception, creates a world of suffering.
6. People believe themselves to be dependent on what happens for their happiness. They don't realize that what happens is the most unstable thing in the universe. It changes constantly. They look upon the present moment as either marred by something that has happened and shouldn't have or as deficient because of something that has not happened but should have. And so they miss the deeper perfection that is inherent in life itself, a perfection that lies beyond what is happening or not happening. Accept the present moment and find the perfection that is untouched by time.
7. The more shared past there is in a relationship, the more present you need to be; otherwise, you will be forced to relive the past again and again.
8. Equating the physical body with "I," the body that is destined to grow old, wither, and die, always leads to suffering. To refrain from identifying with the body doesn't mean that you no longer care for it. If it is strong, beautiful, or vigorous, you can appreciate those attributes—while they last. You can also improve the body's condition through nutrition and exercise. If you don't equate the body with who you are, when beauty fades, vigor diminishes, or the body becomes incapacitated, this will not affect your sense of worth or identity in any way. In fact, as the body begins to weaken, the light of consciousness can shine more easily.
9. You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you and allowing that goodness to emerge.
10. If peace is really what you want, then you will choose peace.

In a nutshell, just make peace with your present moment by accepting it as is. Don't resist it, rather embrace it, after all it is all you have got. That is why it's called a gift, a present because it's the most precious time. If you truly think about it you'll come to know that you can not undo the past nor can you control the future... but you can do something about the present. And lastly, don't look for happiness elsewhere. Everything that is inherently good and joyful is already something that you posses within, waiting to be illuminated by the light of your presence for it to shrine through. Click this link below.

From O, the Oprah Magazine Online